The 7 Steps to Freedom from Alcohol – Preparation
You have already come farther than most.
It may seem that you have gotten nowhere! Not so.
Let’s have a look at your progress so far.
You have:
Faced up to the fact that your relationship with alcohol is not what you would like it to be.
That’s Step 1. Consternation
You have:
Become aware that you need to do something about this alcohol problem, once and for all.
you may have tried to control drinking yourself and failed,
returning to your old ways.
You need some help from somewhere.
but where?
That’s Step 2. Realization
You have:
Looked and found an example, an individual you admire that gives your ongoing motivation.
That’s Step 3. Inspiration
NOW YOU NEED TO COMMIT TO A SYSTEM
This is STEP 4. PREPARATION
You’re in good hands here, a proven process to follow so you can be the person you want to be.
Follow the process.
A SUMMARY
Let’s go through what we have discussed so far in these blog posts.
- Accountabilty – so you stick to the process
- What to tell family and friends
- You’ve created your WHY.
- You know you need to take baby steps and why.
- Some GRIT is going to be required
- You know why it is that you want to quit
- You have completed steps 1,2 and 3 of the 7 steps.
So, the next one to deal with is HABIT and understanding this is crucial.
These are the proper PREPARATION steps that are worth doing before you enter the TRANSFORMATION stage.
WHAT IS a HABIT ?
WHY ARE HABITS so HARD to CHANGE?
Defined as- A settled regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up.
e.g. “He has an annoying habit of interrupting me.”
Habit – “A routine or practice performed regularly: an automatic response to a specific situation.”
– James Clear, Atomic Habits
THE POWER of HABITS
Habits are the compound interest of self-improvement.
We make a few changes but the results never seem to come quickly and so we slide back into our previous routines.
But added to this, a slight change in your daily habits can guide your life to a very different destination.
If you can get 1% better each day for one year, you’ll end up 37 times better by the time you’re done.
This means that success is the product of daily habits-not once in a lifetime transformation.
GOOD HABITS v BAD HABITS
Habits are a double-edged sword.
Bad habits can cut you down just as good habits can build you up.
You need to know how habits work.
The task of building good habits is like cultivating a delicate flower one day at a time.
It’s ABOUT a SYSTEM
If you want better results, then forget about setting goals.
Focus on your system instead.
A GOOD EXAMPLE OF A SYSTEM
A good example of this is the UK cycling team which had not won the Tour De France in the 110 years it had been running.
It was when they applied the strategy of
“The aggregation of marginal gains. “That they achieved remarkable success.
Everything they did was to achieve a 1% improvement.
This system won them 5 tour De France in 6 years!
OVER to YOU
Imagine if you applied that to your own life!
BUT the task of breaking a bad habit is like uprooting a powerful oak within us.
If nothing changes, nothing is going to change.
THE 2 STEP PROCESS
A simple 2 step process is all it takes.
- Decide the type of person you want to be.
- Prove it to yourself with small wins.
The focus needs to be on becoming the type of person you want to be,
Not getting a particular outcome.
CUE-ROUTINE-REWARD-THE HABIT CYCLE
“To change an old habit and alcoholism is more than just a bad habit, it is a physical dependence, you must address an old craving.
You have to keep the same cues and rewards as before and feed the craving by inserting a new routine.”
HABITS, HARD to CHANGE?
The short answer to “why are habits so hard to change” is that changing habits is hard, but following old habits is a lot easier. Humans will always be attracted by what comes easier.
This is only an introduction to habits, but it is a key to quitting alcohol which is dealt with in greater detail in the course than space allows here.
Suggested Reading:
Atomic Habits, James Clear
The Power of Habit, Charles Duhigg
So that’s a basic overview of habits and I found this the hardest thing to do, simple but hard.
Once you have a new habit replacing the old the rest is pretty easy.
ONLY 100 DAYS
That’s why we have a 100-day course and an ACCOUNTABILITY GROUP to support you.
COHORT BASED
We run a Cohort Based Course so that everyone on that course is on the same page and can get support from everyone in that class.
Subscribe to my Newsletter to GET ACCESS to my FREE RESOURCES LIBRARY.
IF THEN…… PRE-PLANNING & The Power of PAIRING
So, the next thing to talk about is what you might call a “hack”
“ IF THEN……PRE-PLANNING”
People that use “if then planning” are much more likely to stick to their good habits than people that don’t.
Once we have put in the effort into making an if then plan, it takes much less energy to put it into operation.
– Better than Before, Gretchen Rubin
“ Plans are worthless,
planning is everything.”
– Dwight Eisenhower
Plan to Avoid Temptation
Instead of resisting temptation, try to anticipate and minimize temptation.
Here’s a little story, to illustrate the point.
The goddess Circe warned Odysseus that he and his men sailed near the land of the Sirens, they’d hear the beautiful singing that lured sailors to their deaths.
so, he plugged the sailors ears with wax so that they wouldn’t hear the singing and be tempted.
So, the story goes,
IDENTIFY the CUE
To defeat possible temptation, you must first recognize it, the cue.
BECAUSE – its much easier to carry something out if you have pre-planned it.
An example might help here.
Suppose you are going to a dinner/BBQ with your partner, and you say to yourself
“When I am offered a drink, I will ask for a soda and lime”.
When you arrive that’s one of the first questions you will be asked.
“What’s your poison.”
They will have forgotten that you don’t drink!
Out trots your pre-planned reply.
You don’t have to make a decision because you already made it when you pre-planned your response.
When you are asked why you don’t drink anymore you pre-plan your reply
“my doctor suggest I stop and see if my blood pressure returns to normal” or
“I’m driving tonight.”
What ever answer you pre-plan see it through and you will find it much easier to avoid temptation.
Much Easier
It takes a bit of practice, but I found it really helped me get over those so called “awkward moments.
” If you hum and hah you are more likely to ask for your usual.
Next Hack “PAIRING”
This can work for you making good habits, and against you continuing bad ones.
Example
When I gave up smoking, I had to quit drinking as well.
The two went hand in hand.
Have a drink, have a smoke, to go with it.
It was impossible for me to have one without the other.
That’s the power of PAIRING
There are plenty of examples that can work for you or against you.
Pairing is a bit like cues, they can trigger adverse responses.
HAPPY HOUR?
Unwinding & a drink are an example of pairing.
Getting home from a busy day and relaxing is a cue for a drink.
It’s called happy hour or wine o clock. Don’t fall for it.
The trick is to identify it as temptation hour.
Fill it with something else.
Go for a walk,
go to the gym,
drink something non-alcoholic,
but don’t do nothing.
Drinking something else non-alcoholic is something you have to do,
- because you have to eat.
So be aware of the power pairing can have and
pre-plan what you are going to replace that cue with.
